A Bow to the One-Liners

Here is a small selection of graffiti, car bumper stickers, one liners on the radio, the Net

and passed on from friends. They may not all be politically correct but they reveal a little of what a mad world we live in.


All I ask is a chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.

Beware of limbo dancers. Written on the bottom of the toilet door in a women’s public toilet.

Born free… taxed to death.

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

God hasn’t forgotten the world. He now works on less ambitious projects.

I chose the Road Less Travelled — Now Where the Hell Am I?

I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

I haven’t spoken to my Mother-In-Law for eighteen month. I don’t like to interrupt her.

I drove my parents back to the airport today. They fly out tomorrow.

I tried marijuana once. I did not inhale. — William J. Clinton.

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

I want to be what I was when I wanted to be what I am now.

If you don’t like the news, go out and make your own.

It’s hard to make a comeback when you haven’t been anywhere.

Jesus saves! But wouldn’t it have been better if he would have invested.

Join the Army, meet interesting people, and then shoot them.

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

We are Microsoft. Resistance Is Futile. You Will Be Assimilated


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